“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” Les Brown
While animals are afraid of the impending danger, humans are afraid of encountering misfortunes about the future. For some people, fear helps them do things correctly – and that’s the positive side of it. On the other hand, some people are overcome by fear not knowing how to do things right. What about you? Does your fear destroy you or strengthen you?
Common fears of humans
- Not being good enough
- Being broke
If you are to sum it up, all fears stem mostly from a common source: fear of not being good enough. Do you fear that you are not good enough? You are not alone because most people feel the same way. However, you do not need to allow fears to rule over your life.
How to defeat your fears
Not knowing how to beat your fears is something that can ruin your life quickly. It hinders you to achieve what you can get and then stops you from improving yourself. The following tips will teach you how to defeat your fears:
- Recognize your fears. Most people have fears but they just close their eyes to what they’re afraid of. Recognizing and acknowledging your fears is the first step to really overcoming them.
- Make a list of your fears. Get a piece of paper and list down your fears. Writing them one by one means you accept they exist and that you want to let them go. Once you’ve written them down, you can either burn the piece of paper, or tear it into pieces, or do whatever you want on the paper.
- Feel your fears. If you are still afraid of your fear after recognizing it, then you need to feel your fear. Most of us are ashamed of our fears. You need to put in mind that even the most beautiful person, your favorite actors and singers have fears just like you. This doesn’t exclude leaders and those holding higher positions in the government, company or an organization. Some of them may even have greater fears than yours. Talk to yourself and say, “I am fine. It is natural to have this fear.” Feel the fear as you say this, making sure you experience it. Let your emotions feel the fear deeply.
- Re-assess your fears. Re-examining your fears can help things go right. Think one of the worst scenarios like losing your job. What do you think would happen or would you do in this situation? Accept what happened, look for another, and be hired for a better job. You got rejected by the person you love? Stand up and continue to live. There are other people who will love and care for you better than the previous one. Are you financially broke? Think what you can do to cut down on your expenses. Look for other means to earn money.
- Motivate yourself. To overcome fear, you need to face it and motivate yourself to get rid of it. Let’s say you are afraid of heights. Start by trying to cross the bridge on your own and walk confidently. Look down occasionally instead of just looking straight and rigid. If you fear people not wanting to meet or befriend you, then make the first move. Be the first one to greet people and introduce yourself. Don’t bother if they won’t smile at you; just motivate yourself to do it!
- Be prepared. Accept that your actions have an effect. It can be either good or bad. Do not allow the bad effect diminish your confidence; be prepared by having a plan. Train yourself to face the challenges in order to succeed. If you want to be an actor but fear that you lack the skills, enroll in an acting workshop. Practice and get yourself exposed. Take classes, watch plays or movies and take a cue from some actors. Give yourself time to improve your craft and adapt your own style.
- Live in the present. Do not worry too much of the future. When you tend to worry about what will happen in the next 5 or 10 years, you will forget your current situation. Remember that what you do in the present has a big impact in the future. Eliminate all thoughts of your past failures and mistakes. Get your mind straight and focus on the present. Drive out your fears by doing something right today. Follow your dreams! Stop thinking of what might happen in the future. Pay attention to your present state, do what is right, and be happy!
- Congratulate yourself and celebrate. Be happy and give yourself a shout-out for everything that you’ve done right. Savor the victory and push yourself to continue and take the next round of the challenge. Use each success in your life to come up with another success!
Life, as they say, is full of challenges. Fear is just one of these challenges. Not being able to own and conquer your fears is tantamount to accepting your failure. Do not allow your fears to restrain you from being successful but instead let your fears push you to where you want to be.
Take it slowly and start working on your smallest fear and move slowly until you can overcome your biggest fear. Every successful person started with something small. By taking smaller steps, you will be able to conquer your fears and pursue your goals in life.